This is the Grucifix, a symbol/logo of the band Ghost that I hand embroidered for a friend. Its my first embroidery piece. It has been suggested that i take commissions, would anyone be potentially interested?
A lot of sentiments I see online about “just standing up for yourself” fall apart when considering that a common consequence of “standing up for yourself” is losing a key part of your current support network.
It’s hard to tell someone to stop being transphobic to you when you carpool with them to work, and it’ll get a lot more expensive without them. Can your budget tolerate that cost, or is it the expense that stretches you too far?
It’s hard to tell someone that they need to be more polite to you when they’re the one who helps walk you through legalese. Can you find someone else to do it for you, or are you left floundering?
It’s hard to tell someone to stop being sexist to you when they’re the one writing your reference letter. Do you have someone else who can be your reference, or are they the only one whose letter would be accepted?
In order to be able to stand up for yourself, you need to be able to bear the potential consequence of that person leaving. You need to either have redundancy in your network, or be able to pay for what they did for you. Safety is about more than if someone will hit you.
I assume you’re referring to my addition on this post? All right!
Well first, famed (and to many, infamous) boxer Muhammad Ali wasn’t technically a draft dodger. He was a Conscientious Objector on the grounds of his religion (he was in the Nation of Islam at the time). They just didn’t accept his objection.
But Muhammad Ali was very, very known for being confident and outspoken in his beliefs and in himself. And the main political reason he gave for not wanting to go to war was that he “had no quarrel with the Vietcong”. He was arrested in 1967 for refusing to go, and White America swore he was a coward, an uppity n*gger, and every foul word in the book (for being unwilling to entertain and/or die for them).
It happens in every war; Revolutionary War, Civil War, World War I, World War II. To this day, we are learning of and pushing contributions of Black soldiers and platoons that got ZERO credit in comparison to their white counterparts. Silently sent to the back in history, treated like garbage upon their return, and expected to risk their lives for a country that hates them.
Why would anyone want to fight for that? Why would I want to commit a genocide? Why would I risk my life to commit violence the world over for a country that hates me and disenfranchises my people?
Also, because he was willing to say what needed to be said as a famous face to the world, his words had an effect worldwide. Y'all know how y'all want your celebs to say something? He did! And he risked it and lost it all! So that’s why I brought up Muhammad Ali. Famous Black man who wasn’t just a boxer and entertainer, but an activist who did the right damn thing in the moment, and will be remembered by history as doing such.
At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there’s a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.
Man behind me having unhinged phone conversation. There is an internationally famous dairy in the area I was visiting and he was commissioned by the lady on the other end of the phone to collect specific cheeses from there. The lady is very high strung about the type and condition of the cheese.
The man does not know from cheese. The man “ain’t never seen no cheese but orange before” and “I showed ya list to the cheese lady so if it’s wrong it’s her fault ok?”
I am 80% sure she sent him there for a really specific bleu cheese, 40% sure he does not have the very specific bleu cheese, and 100% sure he’s done with her shit.
Our flight is delayed.
He does not have the cheeses in a cooler, just a regular backpack.
I need to emphasize that there is no cooler bag in the backpack. He has Jansport backpack that is jam-packed with cheeses. There is apparently $405 dollars worth of cheeses in that backpack, which I know because he has been trying to get the lady to venmo him the expense, which she has failed to do. It is unclear whether his relation to the lady is romantic, familial or what, but I’m leaning towards “what”.
Two more people have joined us. One is a very elegant man with a perfect manicure in a tailored business suit, the other is a neon-haired person of indeterminate gender wearing a fox kirigumi. The Shiba Inu has been staring at the latter for three minutes now.
Uh oh.
Cheese man has been demanding payment because apparently he went like six hours out of his way and paid with his own money and between the cheese and price of gas, he is pretty sure he does not have enough money in his account for an Uber home.
The lady is FLABBERGASTED that he is demanding payment at all, as she was under the impression he was doing this for her out of the goodness of his heart.
He’s not having it. He’s insisting she told him she would pay him back- he would have gotten her maybe one cheese somewhere closer to his business in the area out of love, but he went out of his way because she agreed to pay him costs+ extra to cover it.
HE RECORDED THE CONVERSATION IN WHICH SHE PROMISED TO PAY FOR THE CHEESE, SHE’S THAT MUCH OF A FLAKE.
I am about to offer this man cash for some of these cheeses because our flight is now more delayed.
“YOU ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS AND I FALL FOR IT EVERY TIME! NO! NO! FUCK YOU! IF YOU’RE NOT GONNA PAY ME, YOU DON’T GET FANCY CHEESE.”
“OR ELSE WHAT?”
“I’m gonna-? THE BABY SHOWER? MONICA CAN’T EVEN HAVE THIS CHEESE SHE’S PREGNANT!”
“The cheese lady asked if it was for someone because the mushrooms or whatever in the cheese are dangerous for the baby or something?? You wanna poison Monica?”
“WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT THAT?”
“YEAH OF COURSE I GOT THE CHEESE, THATS WHY I DON’T GOT MONEY FOR UBER!”
“YEAH, GO TELL! GO TELL MOMMA I STOPPED YOUR STUPID ASS FROM KILLING MONICA OR THE BABY! FUCK!”
*hangs up phone*
*head in hands, borderline hyperventilating*
The man in the three piece suit is in the chair next to him. He waits a moment, then reaches into his carryon and pulls out an entire bottle of wine with the TSA pre check sticker on it, and taps cheese guy on the shoulder.
“If your friend doesn’t want it, would you be amenable to having it right now?”
Naturally, I have volunteered my box of wheat thins and offered to buy one of the harder cheeses which should be fine if it makes it home.
Meanwhile, Kirigumi has noticed that the Shiba Inu is staring at her and is correctly intimidated.
1. This is some fucking great Camembert. I have compensated cheese guy accordingly. So have like six other people. He’s recouped like half his losses.
2. Cheese guy is crying a little about the cash and opening up about his problems. The cheese lady is his younger sister. Suit guy is being very generous with his Pinot Blanc. We are having a picnic/improv family therapy session.
3. This is apparently the latest in a long string of his sister asking for something and then flaking when he asks to be paid back. Started with paying him back only some of what he was owed, then claiming something she paid for him was of equal value when it was not, then recently telling him his memory is wrong and he said it was a gift or that he’d do it for free.
“Yeah, the specific thing of trying to convince you your memory is unreliable is called gaslighting and it’s really fucked up.” I say
“yeeeeah. The other stuff I forgave because she’s never really had a good job so she can’t pay me back all the time but at least she was making an effort y'know? But that was. That was over the line.”
“If you haven’t already, check on the rest of your family’s finances. My brother started trying to gaslight everyone when he started stealing from our parents.” Says Pinot Blanc.
4. Shiba Inu Lady has purchased a cheddar. Apparently, the dog’s name is Donut, and he’s her service dog because she’s severely visually impaired.
“Oh, he’s a guide dog?” Asks cheese guy.
“oh, no.” She laughs. “He’s too short, and the way my eyes are, it’s easier for me to navigate with a cane. No, the problem I have is that some morally impaired people see the cane and think they can get away with stealing my bag or assaulting me because I wouldn’t be able to give a description- which is wrong, but rather than deal with that I got Donut, and he helps me by howling at anyone who gets in my personal space and biting anyone who grabs me!”
“Uh.” Says Kirigumi. “He’s been staring at me do I need to back up or..?”
“Ohdear! No, no- He wasn’t looking at you! He loves cheese but he knows he’s not supposed to beg so he decided the way to deal with something he wants but can’t have is to stare in the other direction.”
“OKAY!” Says Kirigumi. “I’m wearing fox pajamas and thought like. He thought I was another dog or something.”
“No, no- he doesn’t care about dogs, and you get a warning before he goes for the calves. Very helpful, when I was living in Italy!”
“Oh what part? I have family in Tuscany.” Says Pinot.
“Does he want a cheese? There is still so much cheese.” Says cheese guy.
Plane may be arriving. I am paying for in flight WiFi to keep y'all updated.
1. Cheese guy has sold all but two or three cheeses that he an Pinot are going to eat on the flight.
2. I know they’re planning to continue because Pinot talked to the gate agent so he and cheese guy can sit together and talk about family drama and cheese.
3. Pinot has been teaching him about different types of cheese and how to enjoy them.
4. Cheese guy apparently repairs computers and other technology devices for a living and is currently doing the software version of scraping barnacles and other crap off Pinot'macbook.
5. Pinot is now convinced that cheese guy is the smartest and most interesting man in the world.
disabled people deserve more than the bare minimum to live tbh. and i don’t mean in the “oh we have extra costs that makes being disabled more expensive” - which is true, but i’m counting those in the budget to live. disabled people also deserve enough money to buy treats, nice clothes, fund their hobbies, take a trip away, and so on. being disabled shouldn’t force you into a life of frugality and poverty
Neil Gaiman, what are you doing EVERYWHERE?? Yesterday, you were in two knowledge bowl questions- one involved a reading from a passage in Stardust, and the other was "Which novel, written by Neil Gaiman, published in 2001-" (I didn't hear the rest of the question before I was shaking my teammate to hit the buzzer). And then, this morning, your name was one of the answer options to a radio show question about who wrote a Dolly Parton song. Sadly you did not write a Dolly Parton song.
I’m sorry to disillusion people but Neil Gaiman is made up. He’s “everywhere” for the same reason mall Santas are everywhere. People dress up as Neil Gaiman and go to bookstores and conventions and run social media accounts to spread joy to all the young adults and queer people. But he’s not real. Neil Gaiman is more like a feeling. In Scandinavia he’s known as Nail Guaymin and he leaves books in people’s shoes every November 10th.
I can’t believe there are still people thinking Neil Gaiman is real. Just recently there were articles of him being sighted in Australia. As if such a prolific author would risk get eaten by dropbears. In The Czech Republic he’s known as Nýl Gejmen and every November 10th we drink only dark lager instead of normal beer.
In Finland Niilo Hömömies comes to your house on the 10th and hands out the books himself. It can be pretty expensive to hire someone who dresses up as him for your family, but it’s a much loved tradition here so we’re ready to use a little money to bring joy to the children. It’s worth it, most people think.
In Spain, children invite Neil to visit by putting their most precocious prose and drawings into letters, and then he visits them in triplicate as the “three wise Neils” on November 10. (I don’t know why, his honorary birthday is just a very busy day for all his impersonators.)
In Switzerland, Niel Chäime goes from door to door reciting prose and sometimes poetry. He usually comes in the company of @reallyndacarter, in case there’s leftover cheese.
Tumblr is really delivering on this post 🤣 It’s splitting into lots of different posts, so in an effort to bring some of them back together, here are some additions I love:
We eat sushi the night before, chicken and biscuits in the morning. We have a 10-hour writing marathon on the 10th, then celebrate in the evening with a parade carrying small, gorgeous handmade wooden fountain-pen-and-ink sets through the streets, raising them high and chanting ‘wait and see. wait and see’.
the next day, we stand at the temple of 1000 dogs and cats and throw our coins before the ‘book-never -ending’. that money is gathered and sent to support libraries around the world.
in Massachusetts on Neil Gaiman day, Dunks releases a special Dark Donut. it’s also the one day a year they offer tea in honor of the exotic British origins of the myth. sadly the tea is horrendous but the donut is void-filled and free if you show your library card. I wish they’d make it a regular item
Friendly reminder as we head into tax season (for US Americans), that the major tax preparation companies are fully prepared to lie and mislead you into paying for their tax preparation software when you might qualify for free software through the IRS.
Don’t fall for their bullshit. Visit IRS Free File and see what services are available to you. The requirements vary depending on your household status and income, but if you make less than $79,000/year (which is nearly everyone I know), you probably qualify for something.
Wow, this “gender free” fashion brand sure doesn’t have any AMAB models.
Gonna die fucking mad about this. If you can’t put someone with a beard in one of your skirts, is your clothing gender neutral? If your brand is full of plus-sized black femmes and white, androgynous bean poles, do you really have a handle on diversity?
You passed peer review. Highlighted for emphasis but again:
There’s a post going around Tumblr about how if you’re post-menopausal and have bleeding, you should get it checked by your doctor. I brought some minor bleeding I’d had up in a doctor visit earlier this year, prompted by that post, and this week, after a biopsy, I found out I have cancer. It’s early stage and the survival odds at 5 years are 99%. I have an oncologist appointment and we may have caught it early enough that surgery alone will be sufficient treatment (no radiation/chemo).
So that post may have saved my life and it may have made my treatment a lot easier too.
If you get into menopause and then start bleeding again, really, get your reproductive innards checked out. The life you save may be your own.
11th April 2025
Reblogged From fizzfrenchtoast
Notes: 5
ALT
